I remember a time years ago when I felt so lost. I had absolutely no idea what I wanted to do with my life. I had no direction. I was struggling with old emotional wounds that wouldn’t leave me alone and I lived my life like a tumbleweed blowing around in the dark.
I would attach myself to whatever (whoever) I could find, only to find that it wasn’t stable and I was doing more harm than good to myself. I thought I knew what I was looking for. I thought it was something outside of myself that would complete me, save me or better yet love me. But I never found anything out there in the darkness, just more tumbleweeds like me. We trauma bonded, but never made it out of the dark.
It took me a very long time to figure out that happiness did not exist outside of myself. However, I eventually figured out that who I was, didn’t have anything to do with another person, my family, things that happened to me or my mistakes. None of that was who I was. The moment, I figured that out… everything changed. The answer came once I learned who I was.
I learned that my creator did not put me on this earth to wander around lost, stumbling around in the dark, depressed and suffering. I found out that He loves me deeply, He knew me before I was born and He gave me everything within me that I need. I found out that He will shine a light in the darkness to help you find your way out. I found out that no matter what I have been through, life can be beautiful. I found out that I do have a purpose, which is to help others. Once I found that out, my path became clear.
It’s funny how things change, the moment you find out who you really are. Your whole outlook changes. You start to see what you couldn’t see in the darkness. You begin to see who is really for you and who is against you. You will be able to see who or what is wasting your time and you will be able to let go without hesitation. You will learn to love and protect yourself. You will learn how to set boundaries and associate with only those who truly want the best for you. You will start to guard your heart and protect your peace. I found out that in Him, I have peace even though the world is crazy. I found out all of that and so much more. And that… is priceless!
Till next time,
Drea.
Conversations With Drea 